When I was a wee lad, I would read Piers Anthony novels. I also enjoyed The Lord of the Rings Trilogy. I enjoy the fantasy genre very much. Sure, it tends to be Euro-centric in a medievalist slant, tending to reuse tropes like swords, knights, dragons and sorcerers.

But sometimes, I will be trolling around the Internet and come upon just weird fantasy shit. Case-in-point: A Unicorn Samurai? Now this is borderline furry fetish, isn’t it? To be more accurate, it’s more transformation fetish, which according to Wikpedia is “a person becomes sexually aroused by descriptions or depictions of transformations, usually the transformations of people into other beings or objects.”

You know, I can sort of relate. The fantasy genre is pretty sensual as a whole. After watching Avatar, I’m down with the blue:

"I see you too, baby. Meow!!"

But back to the unicorn samurai, what’s the deal? I think that’s kind of freakier and cheesier than anything from the Lady Gaga-verse.

The sub genre of fantasy themed rock is growing, thanks to artists like Chris Dane Owens, who exists on another plane of existence. His sword and chivalry infused sound is way over the top. He with his Fabio blonde locks, steely blue eyes and Renaissance fair attire 24/7. But, he’s got a following and is apparently, big in Europe. I leave yo now with his music video for Shine on Me, which was an Internet sensation a couple of years ago. I can confidentally say it will melt your face. Enjoy, ye Offender!


  1. Dude, aren’t you in Vegas right now? What are you doing writing a blog and about something so geeky when you should be out counting cards at the blackjack table, doing blow and banging Vegas strippers. Make us proud.

  2. Can’t I take a break in my room to fulfill my offender duty? Off to the spearmint rhino!

  3. Cool, say hi to Amber, Mei-Ling and Booberella for me.

  4. The reason all of us are so hot for Na’vi Neytiri is that she’s wearing a jungle bra that covers only 2% of her breast area. That would be like going out with Megan Fox for the evening topless, with only her lovely locks covering her newly-enhanced mammaries.

    btw – what gives you the idea that the Na’vi are of the feline species?